You are my Song

When lots need to done at Office tomorrow and sleep doesn't even come. When lying down on your elbow you have only one hand free to type, you pen down some words in haste and waste and let your mouth do the rest.

you are my song.wav - Aman Rathi

Colorless

She came with no colors
she was colorless
like water, like silver
like you can see
yourself in her

she came light blue
in the morning sky
wrapped an orange
in an evening sigh
and shone yellow
in sunshine dry

Do you see the colors
in the colorless, my friend ?
For Colorlessness is not
the absence of colors
but presence of all.

---------------

Whole day spent in bed...8" thick snow outside..dont really know what to do. I see snow.. I adore it..I step into it a bit..but then step back.. I dont have any shoes to move around in snow..Buses are not plying..I can't drive either with such snow laden roads..Remote login to office isnt working either..All in all I am physically cutoff frm outside world except for cellphone and internet. I do have minimal supplies of food to survive a few days.

Anyways, such a wasteful day gave me a chance to watch two gud movies - Sleepless in Seattle, Philadelphia.

A Slum Affair

It grew like a weed.
गली की गन्दी कीचड़
में उगता हुआ
वो नन्हा सा पौधा

लोगों की नज़रों से
बचता बचाता अब

बड़ा हो रहा था

नहीं ऐसा नहीं
की किसी ने उसे
कभी कुचला न हो
या शरारती बच्चों
ने कभी छेडा न हो
इनकी तो आदत
हो गयी थी उसे

झुग्गियों में जहां
पैर रखने की जगह नहीं
उसे अपनी अलग ज़मी
कोई कहाँ से दे

आज शाम भी
किसी ढोर से
बाल बाल बचा

इन्तेज़ार है रात होने का
जब नाले की बदबू में
ज़रा खुलके सांस लेगा
और सोये हुए मोहल्ले में
ज़रा चैन से अंगड़ाई लेगा

उन झुग्गियों में
इश्क की कहानी भी
कुछ वैसी ही है


Watched Slumdog Millionire a few days back. Among other things I was tempted to think how love survives in slums.

Ek Gumshuda Khwaab (A missing dream)

Hopped on to this movie called 'choti si baat' just by chance. Was surprised to find that the following song is from this film only.

Haven't finished the movie yet, but the rib-tickling bus-stand romance of Amol Palekar and Vidya Sinha is already making me want to toast a few lines.

एक गुमशुदा ख्वाब

है कोई ख्वाब
क्यों मुझे याद
नहीं आता है

किसी धुंध की
चुनरी में
दुबक जाता है

किसी फूल
की गोदी में
सिमट जाता है

किसी गैर के
कमरे में
सो जाता है

कभी हवा
कभी पानी में
घुल जाता है

किसी मर्ज़
किसी दर्द
सा तड़पाता है

जिस रोज़ तुम्हे
बस स्टैंड पे
खड़ा पाया था

बस उसी रात
वो गुमशुदा ख्वाब

मिल पाया था

Mob vs Individual

I am the mob
who suppresses
my individual,
so-called heretic,
aspirations
which talk of
change.

The mob in me
kills
the individual in me
every time.

My Experiments with Solitude - Living Alone 2

And here comes part 2, much better than part 1(i.e the first few days). I guess I had made a mistake by judging it prematurely before even passing a week :). Part of the dilemma could have been due to the house not being set-up , no food & grocery and hence it was somewhat uncomfortable and that too all of a sudden. Though house isn't set up even now ( am working on it ), things are already becoming better and infact setting up the house might be some fun stuff too :) . And I also need to start cooking soon.

Living with friends is surely fun..no doubt..and I do miss that at times. But still wanted to live alone for a while..may be just for an experience i guess..may be because I always thought that I should do it once.. .

Anyways, Looks like its going to be interesting seven months ahead !!

My experiments with solitude - Living Alone

[The following text is updated from the last time as are my changing views towards living alone. I guess its a change and every change deals with transients and changing opinions..that phase is still not over for me]

The more you try to find out about life, the more you get sucked into it .. when the whole exercise was actually to emerge out of it. Generally, you restrict your search to your imagination and your thoughts as to why we do certain things..why we feel good or bad or happy or sad about something..

But sometimes, You kind of take another step forward (for good or for bad you don't know) into some mysterious territories to gain a first hand experience of some scenarios which you don't get to experience in general.

Living Alone has been my recent step in that direction. And it has been very funny since then. Every day has been like omg!! So this is what it means to live alone. Ask friends, u might get conflicting views. You were getting conflicting views even before you started living this way. Infact, that was the reason you went ahead and tested the waters yourself (though i agree that always isn't the wisest thing to do). Anyways, sometimes you've got to do some things.

So, coming back to what how I am feeling. Yes, living alone is boring a bit .. but only initally ., But unlike what i was told, the boredom is reducing as each day passes. And I am kind of getting used to the surroundings. Part of the reason which makes it a little bad in my case is that currently I don't know anyone in the neighborhood. Anyways, now that I am face to face with solitude, lets befriend it. :)

अब जब तू रू-ब-रू है मेरे

तुझसे ही दो बातें हो जाएँ